Most people have experienced a broken heart, and there are multiple possible causes. But whether it comes from a breakup with a significant other or the death of a loved one, heartbreak is never easy.
Unfortunately, there’s no Band-Aid for broken hearts — but there are ways to ease the pain.
Heartbreak really hurts,
Heartbreak can be such an intense experience that some scientists suggest it feels the same as physical pain. A study found that people had similar brain activity when they viewed a photo of a former love and when they burned their arm.
It might even be possible to die of a broken heart. People who are in the early stages of grief are more likely to experience increased blood pressure and heart rate, which can raise their cardiovascular risk.Trusted Source
How to mend a broken heart after a breakup
As more scientists confirm the biological basis of love, there may eventually be a treatment for heartbreak.
Understand the past
Take an honest look at what you just went through. “Recall your emotions and thoughts during the romance — from its early stages to when things began to get rough, to when it ended,” “Think of other past relationships and look for patterns.”
Prepare a self-care action plan
While it’s tempting to lie around in sweats for days on end (we’ve been there) and stock your fridge full of ice cream and pizza, taking good care of yourself now will save you from more struggle later. “Lift yourself up emotionally, mentally, and physically”. “Exercise. Eat super healthfully. Cut out sweets and alcohol as much as possible.”
When we’re used to being around someone 24/7, it can be quite a shock to our system when they’re no longer around. “Practice deep breathing, yoga, and meditation,” “Connect with people you trust.”
How to heal a broken heart after a death
Losing a loved one is one of the most excruciating ways to obliterate a heart. While there’s no way to bring the person back, there are ways to mend the broken hearts left behind.
Allow yourself to cry
“‘Be strong,’ a phrase often heard during the grieving process, doesn’t have to mean keeping your feelings bottled up inside.” “It can also mean expressing them in whatever way feels best for you. Remember that no one ever died from crying.”
Make space for the loss
It can be tempting to just try to forget about your loss and move on with the endless distractions available to us these days (alcohol, projects, dating apps, you name it), but you can’t outrun grief for long. “Don’t fully immerse yourself in work or other activities. Loss is a part of life, so make room and time to grieve,” Lerner says.
“Don’t feel guilty about enjoying life even during the grieving process. Make time to do things that you love and that help you feel good.” “Keep your house organized, buy yourself flowers, take a bath, connect with pets — whatever works for you!”
When it comes down to it, the only true cure for a broken heart is… time. And until you get some space from your loss, there’s no denying the pain (that’s why there are a billion songs about it!). Luckily, there are some tried-and-true methods for coping with heartbreak.
If you notice that grief is getting in the way of your daily life, or you’re experiencing symptoms of depression, don’t be afraid to reach out to a professional. They can be the compassionate ear you need, especially when others just don’t know what to say.
Whether you’re going through a rough breakup or grieving a death, remember these core tenets to help your heart recover: honesty about your experience and your emotions, compassion for yourself, social support, and self-care. After a while, you’ll start to feel like yourself again.
This Is Your Brain on Heartbreak
Why does getting dumped hurt physically?
As most of us know all too well, when you’re reeling from the finale of a romantic relationship that you didn’t want to end, your emotional and bodily reactions are a tangle: You’re still in love and want to reconcile, but you’re also angry and confused; simultaneously, you’re searching for a “fix” of the person who has abruptly left your life, and you might go to dramatic, even embarrassing, lengths to get it, even though part of you knows better.
What does our brain look like when we’re in the throes of such agonizing heartbreak? This isn’t just an academic question. The answer can help us better understand not only what’s going on inside our lovelorn bodies, but why humans may have evolved to feel such visceral pain in the wake of a break-up. In that light, the neuroscience of heartbreak can offer some practical—and provocative—ideas for how we can recover from love gone wrong.
But romance isn’t the only thing that stimulates increases in dopamine and its rocketlike path through your reward system. Nicotine and cocaine follow exactly the same pattern: Try it, dopamine is released, it feels good, and you want more—you are in a “goal-oriented motivational state.” Take this to its logical conclusion and, as far as brain wiring is concerned, when you’re in love, it’s not as if you’re an addict. You are an addict.
When you’re deep in the mire of heartbreak, chances are that you feel pain somewhere in your body—probably in your chest or stomach. Some people describe it as a dull ache, others as piercing, while still others experience it as a crushing sensation. The pain can last for a few seconds and then subside, or it can be chronic, hanging over your days and depleting you like just like the pain, say, of a back injury or a migraine.
But how can we reconcile the sensation of our hearts breaking—when in fact they don’t, at least not literally—with biophysical reality? What actually happens in our bodies to create that sensation? The short answer is that no one knows. The long answer is that the pain might be caused by the simultaneous hormonal triggering of the sympathetic activation system (most commonly referred to as fight-or-flight stress that ramps up heart and lung action) and the parasympathetic activation system (known as the rest-and-digest response, which slows the heart down and is tied to the social-engagement system). In effect, then, it could be as if the heart’s accelerator and brakes are pushed simultaneously, and those conflicting actions create the sensation of heartbreak.
The heartbreak pill?
Focus on the good that you have ahead of you, distract yourself with good positive vibes and get into activities that interest you so you don’t feel sick from the heart thinking about your partner!
Next blog will be out on 29th May at 4 pm.Desai Thoughts MEdia.
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